Deep Thoughts

I want to prepare you. Yes. Indeed, I must prepare you. Many of you will be facing death, as will I. Some though will be gifted to never die. I don't know how you found it, but you found it. You sneaky sheik! The fountain of Youth was actually hidden in Montgomery, Alabama. Who would have thought? Right beside the Town Hall. Wow.

So death. It's coming. I need to ask. What will you be buried in? It's an important question to think about. Soon, you'll be dead, and then you're family is left hanging. They'll say, "So did he want the urn or the casket? Or disintegration and thrown into the wind? I just wish he would have told us." You don't want to put that burden on your loved ones. Of course, who cares, you're dead. Stop swimming through clouds and think about your family. Put down that harp. Concentrate. Technically you're not even there...sheesh.

The urn is a good choice. Hopefully you don't have bad body odor. Because even fire can't get that smell out. You'll be stinking up the family's house until they die as well (too far?).

The casket is traditional. Everyone dies in this. Pretty boring. You want to die with flare, right? If you have to die in a casket, add some hydraulics, paint it neon green, and give it a great sound system with good woofers. Pimp my casket.

Disintegration is unique. Connect yourself back to the world. Burn yourself and fly. Your body that is. Watch as bits of your arms and eyeballs spread across the world. Onto people, onto cars, basically, you're everywhere. On everyone. Ralph Emerson style (wasted literary allusion).

Choose you this day which way you will decompose. And no, that's not Biblical. But it might be Koranic.