Deep Thoughts

sit back, relax, laugh a little.

8/23/2010

Deals Deals Deals!

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Wrote this for The New America blog. I think you'll like it...

Like any normal American, I love the feeling of finding a good deal. You know what I mean. If a sweater is normally priced at $34.95, we utter a little giggle, shake our heads at the outrageous price, and keep shopping. But in glorious contrast, once we see that magical sale sign; the situation changes completely. Suddenly, this piece of overpriced stitching instantaneously transforms into a crown jewel.

The thoughts flood in. “Where have you been my whole life? Wow, this used to be $94.95, and it’s marked off to only $34.95! That’s like 60% off! Yep, this is why I shop. This is why I’m American. I find all the deals.”

Now, in no way am I condemning this common shopping occurrence. People feed off the pleasure of making a deal. I’m no different! Please continue your spending. It helps our GDP (confused and lost? Type it in on Google – learn a little).

I’m here to offer you more deals. Forget the hassle of leaving home; these deals flow to your hands through the power of the Internet. I’ll share the top 5 Internet deal sites I know. If you have some of your own, please comment below. We all need better ways to spend our money. Right? Plus, in the long run, you’re helping the economy. And you don’t want to be a socialist, do you? Be American. Buy things.

SlickDeals.net
Provides hourly deals to all sorts of websites and stores whether it be for pet supplies, electronics, or foot cream. You can follow them on Twitter to gain instant deal access wherever you go. User name is very complicated so be careful. It’s @slickdeals.

DansDeals.com
A blog where the mysterious “Dan” uploads all the deals he finds. Great site to find airplane deals. The website is like a mini-SlickDeals.net. Provides about a deal a day. Good site. Check it out. Also, they can be found on Twitter: @dansdeals.

Woot.com
I love this site. You can hate me; I don’t care. The site sells a daily deal each day. They also have other sister sites: wine.woot.com, shirt.woot.com, and kids.woot.com…each offering their own deals. Sometimes, the site issues a WootOff. When a deal sells out, the day is not over! A new deal pops up ready for you to look at. Twitter: @woot.

DailySteals.com
Not as nice as the other websites, but it still offers good deals. Free stuff occasionally shows up.

DealDump.com
In case I missed a site that you adore, this site includes all the deal sites. Don’t worry; it’s not a dump. It’s actually quite nice and helpful. You would think they would name the site something like DealDeli or DealDirectory, but they didn’t. They chose dump. D-u-m-p. Say it slowly. DUUUMMP. What a word…

Happy Shopping! And keep raising our GDP!

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8/03/2010

Paula Dean's Biography - Secrets Revealed

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For the past week, I've sat down with the famous Food Network Channel star Paula Dean and listened to her disclose the innermost secrets of her life (a little butter can go a long way). Throughout the interview, I gained incredible insights about how Paula has become the woman of today. We cried, we laughed, we ate. Well, she ate. She ate everything. I didn't know our bodies could digest table chairs...

Anyway, I organized all the information into a moderate 562 page biography. I'm still working on the title, and I've narrowed it down to two choices...

Butter me up Scotty
or
Butter, the Other White Meat

I know. It's a toss-up. Both titles speak so much of Paula's life...

Now, I'm going to give you a sneak peek into this breakthrough biography. You get it first, right here on Deep Thoughts. This is fresh, never read before stuff. So don your reading glasses and enjoy. It's a nail-biter.

This section is taken from "Chapter 2: Addictions and Applesauce."

"In the early years of Paula's life, trials faced her at every turn. She grew up in a home of 15 brothers and sisters. The parents forgot they even had her. Plus it didn't help when she had a brother named Paul and a sister named Paulina. Paula was simply forgotten.

This lack of parental relationship fueled a desire for addiction. And the only drug Paula could turn to...was butter. Now, over the years, Paula hid the addiction well. Claiming that food just tasted better with more butter, but friends and family were suspicious. Wasn't 5 cups of butter for a morning omelet a little excessive? And why was there butter on top of the cupcakes instead of icing? What? Butter tea?

Butter was the answer! Or so thought Paula. On June 15, 1979, Paula's life was flipped upside down. She was in for a rude awakening."

The book hits Amazon.com later this year. Be on the look out! Just a little snippet of what you'll expect from the biography. Hope you enjoyed it. There's so much to Paula Dean than you ever thought possible!

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